It’s effecting my work and mu boss seems ready to fire me and i will lose my apartment. I am angry all the time now and I worry I am alienating friends and family. I am fatigued all day long and want nothing more then just sleep and all I can do is lay in bed and hope I have a good night and sleep for maybe three hours and I don’t know what to do. I can’t even afford therapy.
Sleep comes when our bodies and minds are not just tired, but feel safe to relax.
Exhaust the body to feel relaxed? Exercise. Yeah, no one wants to hear it. I don’t either. But it’s huge. Do a fuck ton of cardio. Go on a 5+ mile hike with over 1000 ft of elevation gain (minimum). Your body will be tired. Your body will feel accomplished. You will plop onto anything comfy effortlessly.
Exhaust the mind to feel relaxed? This is important… A busy mind doesn’t always exhaust itself. Mental health 101. You don’t think you’re way out of anxiety or depression. The answer here is meditation, but I cannot meditate to save my life. Guess what I do? I go on a 5+ mile hike with over 1000 ft elevation gain (minimum). I go a little slower than I think I should. Big rule for this if In really stressing is NO STOPPING til the summit. And when the breathing starts getting heavy, that’s when I meditate. Suddenly the only thing I can think about is breathing. Suddenly being economical with my breathing is helping me achieve my goal. I sure as shit can’t effectively ruminate about whatever is bothering me.
So for the mind… Meditate. Or exercise. Just don’t let stress fool you into thinking it’s a mental workout. It’s just a drain.
Those are my two biggest tips for a good sleep. Do a 5+ mile hike with 1000ft+ elevation gain and Do a 5+ mile hike with 1000ft+ elevation gain. Eat a good dinner after. Maybe a night cap, but be sure to hydrate.
Edit: the other thing that really works for me for mental workouts besides exercise is learning something new. Like really dig in and challenge your brain for a few hours. Learn a song you like on an instrument you barely know how to play. Go through a machine learning tutorial. Build a house in a CAD program. Animate something. Build something. Cook something new. Etc etc.
I don’t know how supportive your boss is, but do you think it’s worth telling them you’re having problems sleeping and that you’re making effort to resolve it?
Edit: also, I’m really sorry you’re going through this. I had a bad period of insomnia years ago and it really fucked me up. It will end though, hang in there.
Try taking some Benadryl?
Melatonin or sleepy tea can also help alongside physical activity!
Do something before sleep that will make you sleepy, e. g. read a boring book. Sometimes we only need that little push.
Also go for a walk. Just an hour. Fresh air, natural light and a little exercise (walk slowly!) helps a lot. Also sit on a bench for a while if there’s one. And when you want to get up stay put and sit for another while.
Watch the nature/city/whatever. Think about how what you see came to be.
Do not check your watch or phone. Don’t even take them with you! You want to distance yourself from what keeps your mind busy.
Do not let something or someone pester you or push you to speed up. Go slowly because you want to go slowly without a care in the world.Always keep one of these small puzzle books (with sudokus, crosswords and stuff) with you. Whenever you think about one of the things that bother you, shout loudly “STOP!” and then try solving one of the puzzles for 10 or so seconds. The goal here is not to actually solve the puzzles but to stop you from pondering endlessly and steer your mind into a different direction. Always thinking the same is the reason you are fucked up!
When you feel you mind is overloaded during work grab a bunch of paper to look busy and walk down/up one staircase and then walk up/down the other one to complete the loop. Do this to distract your mind so it can reload.
Avoid stuff that upsets you like watching the news. You want to calm your mind and not send it into overdrive. If you have a hobby that can completely occupy your mind do that!
Do not expect this to cure you. It’s only a part on the way to recovery. Only a real therapy can cure you.
If it’s from current events in America, I had the same problem til I started going to protests. Otherwise, meditation and/or some basic meds might do the trick.
My mind races when attempting to sleep. I have to get it to be bored. Lay down and thinking “breathe in, breathe out…” when stupid thoughts come along, mentally push them aside and say “tomorrow I’ll take care of that” and rn “breathe in breathe out repeat breathe in breathe out…”
Bored to sleep.
This may not work for you, but was advised by my therapist.
Edit: practice makes improvements
Do you have caffeine after Noon? Do you have alcohol at night?
Yeah, I get thatnis part of the problem. But I am addicted. I was able to quit drinking I quit pills with little problem. But this is something i seem un able to beat
Caffeine and alcohol both negetively influence your sleep. So either cut down heavily, or quit totally
It’s likely most of your problem. Alcohol helps you get to sleep, but you wake up after a few hours of restless sleep.
You probably need to work on your sleep hygiene. Have you heard of the 10-3-2-1 rule?
Just drink decaf! ;)
+1 for decaf. I went totally caffeine free in college, and there’s a huge variety of caffeine free / decaf options out there that taste similar enough to the real stuff. Coffee, tea, soda… I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything.
OP, brace for headaches while your body goes through caffeine withdrawal. It sucks nearly as much as quitting nicotine. But the end result is 8 hours of restful sleep every night with little difficulty.
Yea when I quit coffee, I was so irritable for a few weeks. I’m almost amazed I still had a job after that.
But after, I found out my energy level throughout the day was much better, more constant.
Less spiky, less crashy.I think it’s also better for you. My grandmother’s doctor told her to only drink it.
