It’s effecting my work and mu boss seems ready to fire me and i will lose my apartment. I am angry all the time now and I worry I am alienating friends and family. I am fatigued all day long and want nothing more then just sleep and all I can do is lay in bed and hope I have a good night and sleep for maybe three hours and I don’t know what to do. I can’t even afford therapy.
Do something before sleep that will make you sleepy, e. g. read a boring book. Sometimes we only need that little push.
Also go for a walk. Just an hour. Fresh air, natural light and a little exercise (walk slowly!) helps a lot. Also sit on a bench for a while if there’s one. And when you want to get up stay put and sit for another while.
Watch the nature/city/whatever. Think about how what you see came to be.
Do not check your watch or phone. Don’t even take them with you! You want to distance yourself from what keeps your mind busy.
Do not let something or someone pester you or push you to speed up. Go slowly because you want to go slowly without a care in the world.
Always keep one of these small puzzle books (with sudokus, crosswords and stuff) with you. Whenever you think about one of the things that bother you, shout loudly “STOP!” and then try solving one of the puzzles for 10 or so seconds. The goal here is not to actually solve the puzzles but to stop you from pondering endlessly and steer your mind into a different direction. Always thinking the same is the reason you are fucked up!
When you feel you mind is overloaded during work grab a bunch of paper to look busy and walk down/up one staircase and then walk up/down the other one to complete the loop. Do this to distract your mind so it can reload.
Avoid stuff that upsets you like watching the news. You want to calm your mind and not send it into overdrive. If you have a hobby that can completely occupy your mind do that!
Do not expect this to cure you. It’s only a part on the way to recovery. Only a real therapy can cure you.