Insisting your fate was sealed the moment you clicked the link, a report released Tuesday found that you will be fired for reading this headline about Charlie Kirk. “Shortly after you navigated to this article, your IP address was logged and your supervisor approved the decision to remove you from your position,” the report read in part, revealing that the choice had been made after a brief conversation among your superiors in which it was repeatedly emphasized that your behavior in loading this page and spending nearly two minutes reading its content about the late Turning Point USA co-founder was an action inappropriate for the moment. […]
If I insist with a straight face that Donald Trump most certainly does not have a small penis, will I be rehired?
When he holds it in those hands of his, it looks entirely average.
Depends, how much gold did you bring?
I don’t think Depends need to give gold to Donald he’s been wearing them for years now
i mean i’m not that smart and i can see the difference between what they want and what you’re saying
I think it’s time to stop labelling the onion as satire.
Our entire existence is satire at this point, on this timeline at least.
Me, personally, I’m cheering for the comet.
My GF is gonna be pissed that I lost my job.
Oh well, at least I am not a fascist piece of shit.
currently on work’s wifi, let’s see how it goes 🤞
SSL
Netskope.
It’s common for workplaces to install CA certs on work devices then run all traffic through a proxy that decrypts and inspects all traffic.
Unfortunately true. I have to route all my traffic through a websocket tunnel to stop them spying.
My work does, as I discovered when I wasn’t connected to my VPN and DAVx5 asked what was up with the certificate.
Good knowing’ ya.
One of the professors at the law school I work at just got canned for something she said, sooo yeah this is basically how I feel
I’m terrified. The Right is coming after us. They are straight up using Kirk’s death as the modernbday reichstag fire. This is no time to be laughing.
hyperventilating
It’s not the Reichstag fire in the sense that Trump can call a vote on totalitarianism. But yeah, one’s feelings on the matter are now a clear litmus test.
With AI scanning our comms, my free speech has been chilled, though I’m still a fucking loud mouth.
We’re not quite there yet, but in a year or two, I could see my passport application being denied, or my wife not being allowed back in country. She’s dying to go home and see her kids, and we’re doing it, but I’m scared shitless. And in the meantime, I’m armed everywhere I go.
In my current organization, I think I’d be more likely to be fired for supporting Charlie Kirk than opposing him. I’m not bragging, just grateful.
I’m getting fired because I dislike Charlie Kirk’s views but also condemn the violence.
Consider yourself lucky. I’m sure there’s lots of folks like me who would probably get canned for being critical
YOU’RE FIRED!
