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Cake day: February 22nd, 2026

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  • jtrek@startrek.websitetome_irl@lemmy.worldme_irl
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    17 hours ago

    the librarian isn’t picking the books for you dude. you can also go to other libraries

    You can go to other platforms, so I’m not sure what this is a rebuttal of.

    and them thinking I’m a huge asshole

    I mean… if you behave in person like you do here, you might be coming off as not very fun




  • Saying “the apps don’t match people” and “the apps provide a platform [for matching]” is I guess technically true but disingenuous. You could say, like, libraries don’t give you books. You have to go and check it out yourself. Yeah, kind of, but people go there with a purpose the platform is (nominally) intended to fulfill.

    your success on the app is a product of your attractiveness

    I don’t know if that’s really true. I’m middling attractive and had a lot of success. There are a lot of factors.

    I don’t think the sweeping generalizations about people are really helpful. Is this making you happy? Are you doing okay in your dating life?

    I feel like we’ve had this conversation before.



  • I’m not buying into techno evangelism. I’m saying that given a choice between a good faith effort to match users with compatible dates, and something else that will make money, they will almost always choose to make money. You can have success on the apps, but they’re not trying to get that success rate very high.

    Furthermore, many problems people face in dating are present with or without apps. The behavioral and emotional provlems you allude to, I expect.