But they were all of them deceived again, for another another ring was made. In the land of Moredor, in the fires of Mount Doom II, the Dark Lord Sauron forged, in secret, a second master ring to control all others, bigger and badder this time. And into this other ring he poured his leftover cruelty, his extra malice and some more of his will to dominate all life. Another ring to rule them all. And he decided he would go with a hammered black gold finish with a tribal tattoo motif this time, because he thought it looked cool.
Thank you for taking a break from writing almost every show made in the last decade to share this.
Lord of the Second ring, 2 Rings 2 Masters
Ring of Doom 2: Electric Boogaloo
Reminds me of this:
Bombadil 2 - Civil War killed me.
Seems like a quick conflict to me. Might be more like a Christmas special
Viggo Mortensen, the guy that played Aragon, respects the books and would never agree to do more. They wanted him in the Hobbit but he said no because Aragon wasn’t in the Hobbit.
Aragon
Really? I didn’t know this. Mad respect to Viggo.
Viggo Mortensen
Vigio Morganstein
Thank you that was driving me crazy lol
The Gollum Moive is real though.
The bottom stuff has Tom Bombadil, so it’s better and canonical by default.
I mean he has had powerbottombadil at Hotmail dot com for ages
Bombadil Civil War 😂
Bombadil Zero: Origins
The typeface used for Aragorn could only make me more angry if it was Papyrus or Helvetica.
Somehow, Sauron returned.
In this case, that wouldn’t be completely out of the question. After all, he is a minor deity. Plus his boss is still out there in the void. He could theoretically weasel his way back too.
Sauron is gone until the end times when Melkor breaks free and you have Valhalla in the Dagor Dagorath.
Yes, but what about second Sauron?
And evilsies!
I don’t think @einskjaldi@lemmy.world knows about those 🥲
Adventures of the Followship: Endgame confirmed
That is basically the story of LOTR already
But this time he’s in PAWG form. Remember PAWGs? They’re back!
To be fair, I’ve seen quite a few PAWGs cosplaying as elves at conventions. No complaints here.
And Gandalf is still there, but it’s a younger version of him from the multiverse! That’s where the ring came from, the multiverse. And it turns out Bilbo is the bad guy. He’s also from the multiverse.
And anyone else’s characters that didn’t want to come back for more money are all also from the multiverse. And this time they’re not just saving Middle Earth, they’re saving The Multiverse!
Multiverse!
I’m stoked for Gandalf the Whites next evolution, Gandalf the Fabulous. He mostly just leads shopping expeditions and every chapter has an elaborate song and dance number that would put the endless elven poetry of the original books to shame.
Gandalf the rainbow
Gandalf and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat
And Gandalf is still there, but it’s a younger version of him from the multiverse
Isn’t it how the whole Gandalf White thing happened?
I thought he took a bath for the first time in decades after tripping off a bridge
No. There is only one verse. Gandalf died but was sent back into the fight.
Ah, so it’s somehow Gandalf returned
Nah, Eru (literally God) sent him back after talking to him for a few thousand years and was basically like “okay, I know I made Saruman the powerful White Wizard, but he’s fucked up the whole plan I had and you’re the only Maia out of the five that went that has actually tried to do some good, so I’m gonna make you the new White Wizard so you can fix it”
I find it funny that out of 5 demigods sent to deal with an evil demigod only one took his job seriously. Like if 60% of your team do nothing and the head of your team does the opposite of what he was tasked to do you really need to review your
HRMR policiesSo he got promoted to head power ranger? That’s neat.
Yeah I guess so.
I mean… He did already make a butt load of other rings. It’s totally feasible he had a backup ring of power. 🤷♂️
The last one took all his hate and malice; all that he had left for the backup was silliness and whimsy.
Briefly, between the age of elves and the age of men, we had an age of utter clownery.
All that remains of that age are geese and mimes
‘One does not simply waddle into Mordor…’
The Fellowship of the Geese honk in unison.
TRY AND STOP US FROM WADDLING TO MORDOR
So, Alice in Wonderland?
It would be interesting to see an abbreviated version of TLOTR where the Eagles simply carry Frodo to Mt. Doom and we can just avoid all of that other unpleasantness and move on to all of the non canonical prequels/sequels that true fans crave.
“Fly you fools”
The eagles would have to carry Sam who would have to carry Frodo.
Don’t speak that evil into the world, they already ruined starwars
Star Wars was already ruined. The Prequels were shit, it’s just nostalgia why people treasure it today. At least we got Rogue One and Andor out of the Disney takeover. Andor is something Lucas would have never made. The writing is beyond what he can write.
The prequels being shit are still way ahead of the sequels in pretry much everything but the stupidity of including Jar Jar for whatever reason.
We did get Clone Wars, or was that post Disney
And a spin-off series on the gritty back story of Sam and Bill the Pony called “Samwise”
The Children of Hurin might actually be a decent candidate for gritty spin off series.
He’ll be a down on his luck detective charged with finding out who has been pilfering cabbages from Gaffer Gamgees fields.
I mean… he made the first one. Clearly pouring all of his cruelty, malice, and will to dominate all life into the first one didn’t remove those traits from him or he’d have never wanted to touch it once it was forged. He’d be too busy watering the ents and petitioning that brown wizard to stop using bunnies as slave labor to pull his tubby ass around.
Pretty sure Disney isn’t allowed to have LOTR.
I’m sure they are planning on a new movie series starting in 2044. (Copyright expires)
I will allow it if, and only if, they make it a Muppets movie.
They fucking better not be.
Tolkien was writing another installment in the universe, later on in the age or man.
And he discarded it because it was totally unnecessary
It always kinda bothered me how people insisted “Somehow, Palpatine returned” wasn’t a plot hole because it makes sense for the character not to know how Palpatine returned, which is true but ignores that the reason people were angry was thar the audience never got to find out out how Palpatine returned some other way.
I will release a gay porn parody with the sole intent of being more successful than this movie
LOTR 10 - the final finger.
LOTR 11 The last Knuckle
Viewer discretion is advised
They tried a new story with The Acolyte. I would’ve love a new story about the old republic, But apparently the show was too woke. Now we’re stuck with shit we know and some want repeated. I know unpopular opinion and I’ll get voted down.
The problem with The Acolyte, from what I’ve heard and from the clips I’ve seen, is that it was just a bad show… They also tried to retcon some characters due to not knowing the material.
I am with you though… don’t understand why they haven’t explored TOR for a show… it’s by far my favorite era and they have all these characters to choose from due to KOTOR and SWTOR
I’m not a hardcore Star Wars fan. But I enjoyed The Acolyte, and appreciated they tried something different.
