Military brat here, half the soldiers I meet are massive nerds and the other half are goobers (meatheads, guys with no prospects, guys who always wanted to be in the army). Take that as you will.

I’m not a lawyer and I’m not from US, but I’m pretty sure this is not how it works.

Ah but it is. The US is, as far as I know, the only country who taxes its citizens who are living abroad. And yes, it is as stupid and shitty as it sounds.