Idk randomly dipping real hard this week. I don’t seem to be able to fix it and I don’t know why. It will probably pass in a few days, I sometimes get like this. Hard to focus, hppd acting up and partially dissociating. I just want to get back to normal like last week.

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Very easy to get lost trying to answer countless questions without understanding the implications of searching for an answer in the first place! Research takes time and usually leads to more research, and while the article mainly uses the word research what I get out of it the most is really the value of acting with intent and awareness of why you ended up doing a certain thing.

Also, it really motivated me to actually start working on a small video tutorial series for a calculator I wanted to do but kept putting off in the name of “productivity”, so I think drafting a script for it will be tonights project. :)

Soothing

Great in general, limited by back and neck locking up… Trying to do so many things but I have to prioritize literally doing nothing as my back and neck are not in good shape and so I am a bit sad I can’t do everything I otherwise could… For example if I study math it is like studying with an egg timer in my neck, so I can’t afford getting stuck on problems as it physically punishes me lol. But I get a lot of other things done, I just have to settle for surface level and not deep dives that require spending hours in similar positions.

Just came from the doctor so that’s on my mind right now. But it is all from a source of excitement. If I wasn’t loving what I was doing I wouldn’t be bummed out by not being able to do it.