• IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    For all those young people trying to figure out of they are compatible and should get married …

    If you can both afford it … go on an international trip together for at least two weeks.

    Organizing together for something this expensive shows both how committed each other are to one another.

    Spending every single day with each other figuring out how to live with each other during a complicated, sometimes difficult, but very real situations that have to be dealt with shows who each person really is and how they handle things. It gets even more revealing when you both end up in a situation where you are both tired, hungry and stressed out. Even if you are a good planner and organize every hour of a trip, not everything works out and it’s those moments that show who you really are. And the longer your trip lasts, the more these events happen and the more you see the other person because you have to rely on one another in a foreign country.

    I went to Thailand with my wife after we got together (we never officially married because we just didn’t care about that). We didn’t have much money and most expensive part of the trip was the flight to get there. We stayed in hostels, huts, bungalows and shady places and spent every day fearful, hot, confused and wondering what to do next. We did it for a month and we grew to love and trust one another through some really crazy shit. That was 26 years ago and we still talk about it.

    My favorite story about this was a couple we knew years ago. They took one motorcycle and went on a four month journey around North America on their honeymoon. They went as far as Alaska, the Atlantic coast, Pacific coast, gulf of Mexico and down to Panama and back. They’re still together after 60 years.

    • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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      4 days ago

      That’s kind of classist ngl, implying that you should only get married if you can afford a two week international vacation?

      Or European, but that’s still holding something over my American, married on a beach by my mother in law, right back to work, no honeymoon no money for gifts no vacation time to take anyway ass.

      But I understand the sentiment, I’d been with my partner 11 years before we got married, we knew how bad it could get without being the Griswalds

      • Poplar?@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        I dont think its classist since they dont suggest it as a precondition youve got to do before marrying, more a thing you can give a go like they prefaced with “if you can afford it”.