Do you think he can actually experience insecurity? My impression has been the opposite - I think he’s literally shameless. He has absolute confidence and so he never feels the self-doubt necessary to believe that someone worth having as a friend wouldn’t want to be his friend. Only bad people (who are probably plotting against him) wouldn’t want to be his friends.
I admit that if that’s what he’s like, then I’m a little jealous. I mean, I don’t want to be him but I do want to be able to meet a person, be rejected, and then go on with my life without having my deep insecurity triggered. Hell, I just want to be able to meet a person instead of being crippled by even the possibility of rejection.
Sadly narcissism is not just inhuman confidence. Narcissists are emotionally incomplete. The above tweet is a pretty straightforward example of a narcissist’s need for constant admiration, attention, and validation. He does not experience a functional form of confidence or have any inherent self-worth at all, and cannot function without a constant source of external validation.
It’s not possible to be someone who never experiences self doubt. Some people experiment with drugs or alcohol for that, but it only papers over the ugly feelings rather than help with processing them. It’s normal to struggle with insecurity. I found Iroh’s wisdom helpful, despite it being from a cartoon - pride is not the opposite of shame, but its source.
Perhaps like me you’ve struggled to connect with others in that way. Ever since I was little I felt separate from my peers, and I gravitated to others who were aloof, or social pariahs. It… Didn’t work out, and now I’m mostly alone again.
Yeah, this is narcissism. One is so insecure that they defensively convince themselves that the world revolves around them. Any self-reflection ends up so dissonant that it gets shut down immediately. It takes a really hard hit to knock the delusion aside, even temporarily.
Decades of practice in devaluing anyone you don’t agree with makes it easy to jump to “anyone worth anything agrees that I’m the center of the universe.”
Do you think he can actually experience insecurity? My impression has been the opposite - I think he’s literally shameless. He has absolute confidence and so he never feels the self-doubt necessary to believe that someone worth having as a friend wouldn’t want to be his friend. Only bad people (who are probably plotting against him) wouldn’t want to be his friends.
I admit that if that’s what he’s like, then I’m a little jealous. I mean, I don’t want to be him but I do want to be able to meet a person, be rejected, and then go on with my life without having my deep insecurity triggered. Hell, I just want to be able to meet a person instead of being crippled by even the possibility of rejection.
Sadly narcissism is not just inhuman confidence. Narcissists are emotionally incomplete. The above tweet is a pretty straightforward example of a narcissist’s need for constant admiration, attention, and validation. He does not experience a functional form of confidence or have any inherent self-worth at all, and cannot function without a constant source of external validation.
It’s not possible to be someone who never experiences self doubt. Some people experiment with drugs or alcohol for that, but it only papers over the ugly feelings rather than help with processing them. It’s normal to struggle with insecurity. I found Iroh’s wisdom helpful, despite it being from a cartoon - pride is not the opposite of shame, but its source.
Perhaps like me you’ve struggled to connect with others in that way. Ever since I was little I felt separate from my peers, and I gravitated to others who were aloof, or social pariahs. It… Didn’t work out, and now I’m mostly alone again.
Yeah, this is narcissism. One is so insecure that they defensively convince themselves that the world revolves around them. Any self-reflection ends up so dissonant that it gets shut down immediately. It takes a really hard hit to knock the delusion aside, even temporarily.
Decades of practice in devaluing anyone you don’t agree with makes it easy to jump to “anyone worth anything agrees that I’m the center of the universe.”
I don’t think you post something like that for the world to see unless you’re worried, maybe deep down, that people don’t like you.