I cannot stand Hallelujah.

Everybody uses it as an emotional song for their emotional wedding slideshow, literally why???
If you look up the meaning, you’ll see the song isn’t really praising the Lord or whatever these people want, it’s like they just heard “Hallelujah” and ignored everything else.

So now you have the bride and groom’s smiling pictures scrolling by while the dude is rambling about “She tied you to a kitchen chair, She broke your throne and she cut your hair”, WTF??? How come no one ever found this awkward???
Yeah I get it, Samson and Delilah, not really a good match for a wedding!

And it’s overused to shit. Whatever deep meaning this song has, I cannot stand to hear it for the umpteenth time.
Especially not the music composing ramble of the opening verse.
Shut the fuck up about the the minor fall and the major lift.
Please use literally anything else for your photo montage I beg you.

That fucking oh no song

The fact that this was posted 7 hours ago and nobody has said “All I want for Christmas is you” by Mariah Carey warrants an entire episode of Unexplained Mysteries imo.

For me, it’s “Jessie’s Girl”. The things we learn about this girl are: She has eyes, she has a body, at some times she talks cute with Jessie, she loves Jessie. Then the question, “Where can I find a woman like that?”

The contrast between the exceedingly generic description, and the exasperation (as if no other girl would suffice) annoys me every time I hear the lyrics. This is then multiplied by the fact that the song is catchy.

Thunder by Imagine Dragons

Fuck. That. Song.

My Humps by the Black Eyes Peas.

It’s one thing for a song to be bad, and this one was, but there was a period of what felt like months when I had to hear this at least twice a day because it would always be on the radio when I was on the coach to and from college.

Awful, awful, song.

I don’t know what it’s actually called, but I call it “The Mexican Beeping Song”. It was on the playlist at a Mexican restaurant once, and I offered the server $50 he could turn it down/ off /change the station / anything to make it stop. He looked at me with a pained expression and just said “I would do it for free if I could, I hate this too”.

Fun fact! I was literally tortured (yes, actually for real) by Collective Soul so anytime I hear one of their two “hit” songs I get flung into PTSD flashbacks. I have to cover my ears and basically sink to the floor or immediately leave the area if that’s possible.

Suffice to say I hate them.

Also I was a retail slave for over a decade and hate all Christmas music. Super mega hate.

Edit: abused by the music, not the band. Sorry I didn’t mean to be misleading.

I hate All I Want For Christmas Is You and Last Christmas specifically

That shitty version of I’m Blue that has the laziest lyrics ever written with a singer that has an obnoxious nasally voice. “I’m good, yeah I’m feeling alright, this is gonna be the best freaking night of my life” sounds like the first lyrics she came up with when she woke up that morning. That nasally “na na na na na” at the end also grinds my gears. So glad that song isn’t being played on the radio anymore, I’d much rather listen to the original I’m Blue Da Ba Dee for an hour straight than listen to this version even once.

Radioactive.

It had a novel, ear-grabbing sound at the time, but got overplayed to the point where it now just grates on my nerves.

Also: most American wedding reception traditions like The Electric Slide and The Chicken Dance. Do better. I once went to a reception where everyone did The Time Warp and it was amazing.

“Happy Birthday” sung by a defeated waitstaff for the 10th time on their shift.

that maria carey song.

if you don’t know which one I’m talking about… we got about a month and half before you’ll be reminded literally everywhere yooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuouououououuouoouououououououououoououououoOOOOOOOuuuUUUUUUooooUoUOUOUOUOOUUOUUOUOUOUOUO go.

Whatever the title of “This girl is on fire” is.

Pretty sure it’s supposed to be empowering or something but all I hear is ThIs guRl iZ oN FiiIiiRrrrrrRrreee!!! two hundred times in a row.

Like okay she’s on fire. Got it. Get damn fire extinguisher or something and SHUT UP.

Honorary shout out to the 80℅ of songs on the radio thst are about relationships. You know there’s more topics that exist? Does it ALWAYS have to be about relationships?

And Christmas songs on eternal repeat starting before Halloween. Thanks, radio. I hate Christmas songs now. Not because they suck, but because you suck gor playing them over and over FOR HALF THE YEAR.

all i want for christmas is youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu uuu-uuuuuu