I feel it is an obligation for any older folk to pass wisdom to those not-in-the-know of things regarding life. Some people are born directionless and they get lost in their lives and before they know it, they’re knee-deep in debt, they’re in awful minimal-wage jobs, they make poor decisions regarding their love lives .etc
I have several and my more prominent one is;
- Know Your Numbers
This is a key and must-have piece of knowledge. You must know your numbers. How much you’ll earn a month, how much your expenses are, how much is in your bank account, interests and much more. I don’t care if you’ve hated math growing up, you will need to know this. Because going off on guesswork and estimations, only gets you so far before you slip up. Once you slip up financially, missing a payment, you will fall behind faster than you’ll get back ahead or break even. As someone said, everyone is one car repair or medical emergency away from being in poverty.
- Do not get kids in your teens and 20s
Your teenage and young adolescent years, are better spent figuring out who you are and what you want to achieve. Recklessly getting kids with someone who you thought you loved or poor planning are reasons people end up paying child support and having to go to family court and having to deal with custody battles for the rest of their lives. Supporting a kid is $250k PER child, that’s the average, moreso because of the economy. Is it really worth the few minutes of sex at all for that expense?
- Avoid Jail
Going to jail, over anything, is a bad setback to have in life. If you think finding a job is hard normally with the way the job market is, it’ll be twice that if you have a criminal record. That is just shit not a lot will be ignored.
You’ll lose time, you’re likely to lose any jobs you’ve had at the time of going to jail, you may polarize family and friends even. It’s just not worth it, regardless. The more times you end up in jail too, consider your life over.
- Thrift and Thrift Away!
Thrifting can be a dirty word to some who prefer to get things new, which I understand. But it is a money-saver in the long run. For example, my apartment is 85% of thrifted items and I have a hard time recalling anything I’ve spent more than $10 for, aside from select things I bought new because I wanted them new, like some appliances.
Just try not to be a hoarder if it can be helped.
I take offence at 30 being old 😅
Well, i remember being like 25 or so, and i was out drinking. I met this guy and he was alone so we took him with us. We talked, had a lot of fun and everything and at some point i asked: how old are you. Because he kinda looked our age, maybe younger. He said: 32.
It blew my mind. I was like oh my god, this guy looks so young, and he’s ancient. We showed him around and asked random people to guess his age. Omg, can you believe he’s 32 and still up at 2am? Crazy i know.
I am now 40 years old, and find the thought of someone being 32 and old absolutely bizarre, but i do always remember that story. Also i’m now the 40 year old that gets shown around having people guess my age. I think i took over the curse.
Life is a best effort. Make sure the people whose back your scratching are returning the favor.
Don’t get caught holding the bag, in fact don’t even hold the bag.
Finally, if you like weird fashion, just go for it. Shiny black clothes can look great on you if that’s what you actually like.
It sounds paradoxical but a lot of the things we were taught and developed presumptions of from our parents become obsolete. For example, while thrifting never becomes obsolete, simply working hard and saving alone are not enough anymore to enjoy life, buy a house, raise a family and then retire comfortably. This is something that older generations don’t grasp on the frustrations of today’s young adults. This is why it’s important to either have side hustles, or do investing if they can-- anything to supplement the traditional means of income.
The world constantly changes at an exponential rate, but the human mind isn’t evolved to deal with such rapid pace. While some but not all traditional knowledge becomes obsolete, the human capacity to adapt doesn’t.
Kill your masters. There is no future with them alive.
Try drugs. Do not get addicted to drugs. Seriously, all if them at least once.
Try drugs. Do not get addicted to drugs. Seriously, all if them at least once.
I strongly disagree with this (apart from the not getting addicted part). Recreational drug use can be fine if done in moderation and responsibly, but there is absolutely no need to try any drug and some drugs are simply not worth trying at all.
No matter what people tell you, no you don’t need to try DMT or shrooms or whatever. Go for it if you really want to, but none of those experiences are unmissable and no drug can teach you anything you about life that you can’t figure out on your own.
Source: I have done a lot of different drugs and in retrospect none of them are as big of a deal as people make them out to be and plenty of them are straight up stupid or dangerous.
If you’re romantically interested in someone, say “hey, I’m romantically interested in you”.
Do not have a “crush”, do not have a friend you’re secretly in love with, do not secretly pine for anyone. It is not interesting, it does not make you stronger, you are not the protagonist in a romance novel, and you are dumb if you want to try to “save our friendship”.
If the other person is not interested, say “Thank you for your honesty. It’s been nice knowing you” and move on with your life. Stop wasting time. Life is too short.
Say what you mean and mean what you say. Don’t waste precious time on imaginary scenarios.
Problem is if it’s a coworker to whom you’re interested in. A lot of people are hesitant to ask their coworkers for date because of the adage “don’t shit where you eat”.
Read books, get off the internet.
It’s not easy.
Don’t smoke, don’t drink, don’t use recreational drugs.
No sugar, no processed foods. Make all your own meals from the freshest ingredients you can afford, mostly vegetables. Food is not entertainment, food is not reward.
Avoid antibiotics in your cleaning products and food, so when you need them to save your life, they work better.
Exercise, move, get up off your ass.
Pay attention to your body, don’t avoid doctors because you don’t want bad news. The longer you wait, the worse it gets. The older you get, the more issues you have. Doing the previous things above, makes this part much easier.
Put yourself first, if you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else.
Party all the time. Use all drugs. Fuck with everyone you can.
Drink water… seriously. Make tea if needed. No sodas.
Invest heavily in a good mattress, you spend 1/3 of your life on it.
Try and make something. Woodworking, painting, music, anything that makes you feel happy.
Find 2 or 3 good friends and keep them for life.
Stay away from religions and cults.
(optional) get a dog. Man and dog evolved together, we need each other.
deleted by creator
Read books, go to therapy,
Reject defensiveness and self righteousness. Embrace humility and human connection.
Say the thing.
Don’t apologize, couch, caveat, joke, fuss, start with context, equivocate, mumble, bumble or talk around the subject. Just say it.
Yes. This.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Find something you love to make your goal in life. Only finding motivation in stressors to escape rather than something to move towards will burn you out and drive you to the depths of depression, even if you’re successful at it.
I’ve spent my whole adulthood working in hospitals. They’re shitholes, every single last one of them. Do every single thing you can to never be in one.
Drink water, plain water. Eat whole grains and leafy vegetables. Treat red meat like a dessert (and if you’re morally opposed to meat, make sure you’re still getting all your essential proteins). Find a physical activity you enjoy and do it at least three times a week. Either join an organized religion or specifically curate a group of people you do a weekly activity with who will come check on you if you suddenly stop showing up. And while you’re at it pick a mindfulness activity that you either enjoy or that brings you peace (prayer qualifies but so can yoga or a lot of other things). Avoid nicotine and alcohol at all costs. Go easy on the weed, and avoid anything more interesting without guidance from either a medical professional or some kind of traditional expert on those substances. And if a competent doctor listens to your specific situation and tells you to do or not do something I’ve mentioned, listen to them instead of me.
Decide who you would want to speak for you on your death or near-deathbed. Choose people both trustworthy and level-headed who will put your wishes over their own emotions. Choose multiple people, because it’s not unlikely that any one person will be in the car wreck with you. Talk to those people about what you want to happen or not happen so they can best carry out your wishes. Sign some kind of legally binding paperwork that cements them as the decision maker, especially if your first choice is not the default the state would choose (parent, spouse, sibling, adult child, etc). You can write whatever you want then to do on the paper, but the chosen person will have the right to override it if they think you would want them to. So sign the paper but don’t forget to TALK to them about it.
And good luck because while this will give you the best odds, the universe might also just decide to fuck you in particular anyway.
Find a physical activity you enjoy and do it at least three times a week. Either join an organized religion or specifically curate a group of people you do a weekly activity with who will come check on you if you suddenly stop showing up.
I managed to get both these with sport teams. (At least in my area), the local sports competitions are actively looking for players, and if you have skills or enjoy a role others don’t, you can even just volunteer (instead of pay fees) in a few teams before joining one you like. And one foot in the door will likely get you invited to other teams and competitions when someone’s team needs a substitute player (or you can just ask, “Does anyone have a team that play on Thursday nights?”).
In my favorite team, I became de-facto captain of because I showed up most reliably and was the remaining member of the original team as people left and joined. One week I forgot to tell them I would be away for the match due to travel, and the next day I wake up to a couple of check-in messages just to make sure I haven’t vanished or had a bookshelf fall on me. And it’s a reassuring feeling to realize you’re part of a community that cares about each other.
I asked this same question to my older coworkers back when I was 20. The main answer I got was: travel, travel, travel! “Travel before you have kids.” “Travel before you start a long-term career.” “Travel before you buy a house.”
Naturally, being a Millennial, all three of those things became non-issues. 🙃
So let me give some advice for the ages instead, regardless of what the future may hold for you:
• Never stop learning
• It’s okay to not know what you want to do with life
• And, especially in a post-truth, AI-infested world, question everything!
Take the time to learn what logical fallacies are (at least the common ones.) You WILL encounter them, and knowing when you or someone else is using faulty logic can keep you from harm, whether it be from another person (like what we see in politics) or from yourself (like the “Sunk Cost Fallacy,” which might otherwise lead you to stick with bad jobs, bad relationships, and more.)
Tangentially, it’s okay to say, “I don’t know.” Nobody knows everything. Anyone who expects you to know any given thing (unless you’re known to have studied it, of course) isn’t someone worth the admiration of. People with realistic expectations will see you as genuine, and being genuine can carry you far.
I could probably think of more if given the time, but those are the most important things off the top of my head. I’m open to questions in the comments; I’ve lived quite a peculiar life, so I’ve got a range of experiences, from being a homeless vandweller, to being a pilot, to pivoting 90° to working with kids and making art. I’m more than happy to answer any questions that might help people out!
