• 1 Post
  • 36 Comments
Joined 4 months ago
cake
Cake day: November 7th, 2025

help-circle



  • Awesome game FNV. I should replay it. (Even though it’s harder for me to find the will to play video games now. Been better lately)

    Then I don’t really know what to say about depression. I’ve lived some hard times with it struggling with body issues and addiction (well mine is about sugar… I can’t say it’s the same as you but it never helped about my weight and liver). And my mom had some mental health issues that probably affected me too.

    It’s hard to find a reason to keep fighting. I struggled 3 years in university failing and at some point I started just going to the gym instead hiding from my parents that I didn’t go to university. Mine was trying hard to fix myself and trying a fresh start ( I don’t know how I started). But the turning point was when I met my wife I’ve met 8 years ago. I didn’t even fathom my transidentity (I’ve been really dense and was probably running away from it.). At first I didn’t know her troubles and then I had to stay strong to support her and pushing away my troubles to help her. (No that wasn’t healthy for me…)

    I can’t really tell you how I’ve been handling this, there’s ups and downs throughout our relationship, but so far I’m not taking any meds even though it would probably have been easier. Maybe I was running away from psychiatrist because I’ve never found one that I would consider safe?

    Anyway, I think love made me push this far. I don’t know if I will be happy with the changes of my body with HRT, but I keep hoping. At least even though if I’m not entirely happy with myself I know it will still be better than before. And mostly people will find beauty where you would not about yourself. It’s hard to love myself but when I see my wife loving me and the way I look even though sometimes I loathe the way I look, well I glad someone can appreciate me this way.

    I don’t know if this message makes sense or will help but that’s a sum up of my experience.










  • I made some kind of announcement to my close relative that are safe after either inviting them over or going over to them. "At some point I went by oh by the way I have something to tell you. I’m transitioning and started HRT F. Feel free to still use my name as I haven’t yet chosen my name I will go by.

    As for work (oh boy lots of racist people and probably transphobes… 🤞) and my parents (might go correctly or poorly 🤷‍♀️, but since my dad depends on me for things he cannot do anymore. He has more to loose by rejecting me and so far I know he loves his kids…) They gonna have to ask questions themselves when they will notice that I look more and more feminine.



  • Basically planning the administrative hellhole to be able to get my hormones and others things covered (mostly covered) for my transition. Since I’ve have not a great reaction to benzyl Benzoate from the DIY EEn. For now I have to accommodate to the inflammation it gives me at the injection site and probably guide the doctor apprently friendly but she doesn’t know much about transition.

    I think I will give out my second vial to the local trans association for someone in need. Still hard for me to train my voice though. I don’t find time except in the car going to work. Can’t help to feel like I sound silly when I try to speak with my “feminine” voice.





  • Thanks for the clothing advice.

    As for work well… That’s a wait and see… Probably will wear a sport bra real soon. My breast growth has been fast for a month.

    For work, I’m contracted for 3 years. I will fight and not be silent towards incorrect behavior.

    As for parents it’s more complicated. My dad is racist (not hatred towards everyone but still the mind of the good ones and the bad ones), homophobic (like saddly a lot of 60 years old)but dependant administratively on me or my brother and sister. Since I’m the only on close physically. He won’t have a choice to accept, and probably because he loves us in the end. As for my mother. I’m afraid to trigger something about her schizophrenia. I won’t extend about it because the goal is not to trauma dump.

    In the end I’m doing this for myself. My choice to transition will have consequences but I choose to care and express myself now. Better that than living and denying my own needs and wants like did before.


  • I feel a bit the same.

    I don’t have really any taboo, so that’s fine with me. I haven’t yet crossed the step of going into feminine clothes nor makeup outside (that’s still relatively new. I understood my transidentity 3 months ago and started hrt 1 month ago DIY.)

    Only went out twice with mascara and feminine shoes (well they are not the most feminine ones but still dark and pink).

    But clearly I’m not passing and not trying hard to do that now. I’m haven’t done my CO to my parents nor at work. (And oh boy that will probably be bad knowing I’m in workplace that half is probably leaning far right.)

    I’ve been lurking in some discord server trying to read other people stories and their view to forge mine basically and here I am.