• Tarquinn2049@lemmy.world
    67·
    7 hours ago

    One way to understand them better is to occasionally talk. Cuz like, guys and girls are actually incredibly similar. A couple of conversations a day, with the occasional really good conversation, can go a very long way towards understanding each other. Everything you don’t talk about is one more thing you won’t understand.

  • jet@hackertalks.comEnglish
    998·
    9 hours ago

    Wanted you to fight for her affection. Time to separate and run away

    This will NOT be the last test their partner does. Relationship tests are toxic.

    • ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      50·
      7 hours ago

      Relationship tests are toxic.

      Hah. The woman I was briefly married to really wanted me to be jealous, but I didn’t realize that at the time. I was just happy for her whenever she told be about her great friends who happened to be men.

      This culminated when she told me it wasn’t fair that I had had other sexual partners in my life but she had not. I replied that if she was asking me for an open relationship and it was really important to her, then it would be something we could discuss. That was not what she wanted to hear.

      She was not a nice person (to put it mildly) so I don’t regret being so clueless.

      • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
        4·
        52 minutes ago

        My current SO is similar. They asked if I’d be okay with them watching a movie with a friend of my gender online. I said, “sure, go for it” offhandedly. They were flabbergasted and said they expected me to be jealous. They then asked how I’d feel if it was in person instead, and I said, “I’d want to meet them first because I don’t trust them, but I do trust you.” Again, flabbergasted.

        My SO is a nice person though, just a little protective. We’re happily married and we make sure to inform eachother about anything the other may be uncomfortable with. We just differ in what we’re comfortable with, and I think that’s fine.

    • Nomecks@lemmy.ca
      4·
      55 minutes ago

      Depends where you are. There’s companies here that’ll come to your house and divorce you in a morning.

    • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
      3·
      47 minutes ago

      It is though, if it’s amicable. It only gets complicated if you disagree on who gets what.

      If there aren’t kids or pets involved, just hire an arbiter and be done with it in a day.

        • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
          1·
          7 minutes ago

          That depends on the laws in your area though. In some areas, separate accounts mean something, whereas in others, any income after marriage is considered combined, regardless of who owns the accounts.

          That said, if it’s amicable, it’s fast regardless. Just get a third party to work out the details and it’ll be fast.

    • Kyrgizion@lemmy.world
      21·
      8 hours ago

      Civil unions work like that over here. I could walk into town hall tomorrow and tell them I want to separate from my SO and all I need is my autograph, not even hers.

      • ilega_dh@feddit.nl
        10·
        4 hours ago

        And that’s how it should work right? Nobody should be allowed to keep someone hostage in a “relationship”.

        • the_crotch@sh.itjust.works
          1·
          31 minutes ago

          Marriage isn’t just a relationship, it’s a financial partnership. It’s complicated to dissolve because money and shared property are complicated. Fortunately it’s easy to avoid. Don’t get married, and if you want to end a relationship you can simply walk out the door without a word anytime you want.

        • joelfromaus@aussie.zoneEnglish
          3·
          2 hours ago

          I’ve currently been trying to get divorced for almost 12 months. My ex left me for someone else so you’d think it’d be an open and shut case but she’s also being belligerent within the legal process and drawing out the timeline.

          I find it incredible how many hoops need jumping through in Australia just to not be legally bound to a cheating spouse.

    • pflanzenregal@lemmy.world
      31·
      1 hour ago

      Yeah I’d rather bet that he is kinda emotionally disconnected from anything happening with her (and himself).

      So she probably never feels supported, tried to talk about, didn’t work, finally divorced him but loves him too much to actually go through with it.

      • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
        21·
        41 minutes ago

        Maybe.

        That said, my SO is similar to this. We don’t talk as much as we should, but that seems to be because they got into online gaming with their friends and play during the times we would normally hang out. I’m expected to go out of my way to make up for that, but I don’t need as much emotional contact as they do so I don’t. I’m usually just hanging out on the bed on my own, and I put down my phone, game, book, etc the moment they initiate.

        This causes some issues occasionally, but I don’t think I’m the cause here. We have kids, and I end up interacting with them more to make more time for them to play (I make breakfast and get them ready for bed).

        That said, I’m trying to be more proactive to help them be more fulfilled. I just wonder if anon is in a similar situation.

  • Doom@ttrpg.network
    2816·
    9 hours ago

    Anon is emotionally stunted and this person really loves them but doesn’t feel it back. Anon needs to express themselves better

    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
      123·
      4 hours ago

      Anon sounds pretty over it, and I don’t blame them.

      Also, if they’re making a greentext about this, they’re quite possibly on the spectrum, in which case it’s on their partner to communicate clearly.

  • magnetosphere@fedia.io
    101·
    9 hours ago

    It’s only going to get worse, Anon. Rethink the relationship. Consider filing for divorce yourself.