The highlight of the article is:
“Italian Rainbow Cookies = Luigi’s Cookies
Because in this house? Luigi is a hero. And, as respectfully as possible, a sex symbol. By “house” I mean whatever building I’m physically in when I see Italian Rainbow Cookies.”
Idk, “Rudolph = ‘The Twink’” got me pretty good
I’m a pretty big fan of gay as well
That was really good
Oh people are gonna know the gender of my snowMAN!
Snow isn’t rain, angels aren’t plasma, and “averageheightbread” doesn’t track. On those three I’ll take the side of your Uncle Dimwit. Pretty hard to top “snowperson” though./
Yeah, that and “gingerbread people” (I think “gingerbread them” not only reads more awkwardly, but also is more likely to be misheard and Uncle Dimwit will assume you said “gingerbread men”).